The wolves within

I'm a big fan of the amazing, hilarious, intelligent, eternal supporting actor Stephen Tobolowsky and his podcast The Tobolowsky Files. Stephen has such a talented way of narrating: it's in the cadence of his voice, in how he chooses the right moments to make pauses, to build suspense, in how he arrives to conclusions as he's going along and never beforehand. But most importantly, it's in how he takes his time to let his listeners get comfortable with the story. It is only after he has achieved that intimacy that at one point he hits you with a thought, one that you have probably already heard before; his art, though, lies in making it seem like it's a new one, like you are hearing it for the first time. He lets you feel right at home and then introduces something extraordinary, something poetic that makes you see that same home from a different perspective.

He told this old cherokee legend at the very end of one of his podcasts, after talking about his encounter with an Auschwitz survivor and his rich and terrible anecdotes.

An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. "A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy.

"It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego." He continued, "The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you - and inside every other person, too."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

In the middle of the familiarity, a new way of illustrating (and thus, thinking) the duality that lies in some of us. It still resonates with me. I'm struggling to starve the bad wolf within me so much. Maybe that's my mistake. I should be focusing on feeding the good one. But the bad wolf is too hungry and loud.

So yeah, which one will win. No, no question mark. It scares me to even wonder this.